Lost in Translation

As a Teacher of Modern Languages, mistakes made using the humble dictionary (yes I am quite old) and later the online translator have caused me much amusement. I wish I had written more of them down over the years as I find now that my 40 something mind is not what it used to be. A dictionary or translator is a tool and therefore there is a direct link between how effective it is and the intelligence of the person using it.
One that does stick in my mind from my very first year teaching, when my French was still good enough to teach 'A' level, was an answer from a reading comprehension. The text was about holiday destinations and talked about the fact that travellers were wanting to visit less 'touristy' places. It talked about 'Tierres Vierges' (sorry to all francophiles out there but I don't appear to be able to get a grave accent on this blog) and the question asked why such places were popular with some tourists. One girl answered 'Because there are lots of virgins there'. Quite possibly a more honest answer but unfortunately not what the exam board was looking for.
One very popular translation howler doing the rounds at present on facebook is from a Spanish menu. The item is 'Vino en botella' which should translate as 'Wine by the bottle'. However 'vino' is also the past tense of the verb 'venir' - to come, so some bright spark has translated it as 'He/she came in a bottle'. I'll just have a glass of water, thanks.
Quite a few people have asked why I don't do my blog in French and Spanish as well. The answer is that whilst I could probably have a shot at a literal translation, there is no way I would be good enough to convey the humour in anything but my own language. However, the other day I did decide to try out the 'translation' button which you can add to your blog. I used it into French on the 'Stamp Competition' post and had a look at the results. I am very glad I checked as the results were atrocious. One English phrase 'Mummy and Daddy have a row' was rendered as 'Maman et Papa ont un rang'. 'Un rang' is not 'a row' as in 'an argument', but rather 'a row' as in 'a row of cabbages'.
However, my absolute favourite comes courtesy of a Polish friend who heard this anecdote about a fellow Pole who had moved to Britain and had not yet mastered the language. He wanted to buy some meat, so checked on google translate for what he needed. Feeling reasonably confident he went into his local Butcher's shop and asked for 'half a kilo of chicken tits'. To było upokarzające