Questions I Would Like Answers To

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There are areas of life which, along with some of the finer points of thermo-dynamics, remain a mystery to me. Here are a few of them.

1. Where are the lids for my Tupperware boxes? Or looking at it from a different angle, where are the boxes for my Tupperware lids? I have a plentiful supply of both but they don't fit each other. I feel reasonably confident that when I purchased the said items they had matching tops so what has happened to them?

2.  Why do the men in my life suffer from a complete inability to close things? Cupboard doors are left ajar and drawers wide open. The back gate is never shut - we might as well have just left a big gap in the fence. This handicap also seems to extend to leaving the tops off toothpaste and the caps off pens. I really don't understand this affliction. Is it a recognised medical condition and if so is there any cure?


3. After weeks of playing silly buggers, why does my hair always look really nice on the day I have an appointment for a cut booked? Perhaps I should try making multiple appointments in the hope of confusing it into submission?


4. What happened to my Adam Ant mug? It was last seen circa 1982 in the Melton Constable area. I'd quite like it back even after all these years, and despite the fact that Adam is now a fat, middle-aged bloke with quite a lot of issues who is rubbish live.


5. Why, in all the houses I have lived in, have I never been up to the loft? Is there some 11th commandment that women are not allowed into this area of the house? I have stood at the bottom of the ladder passing things up to Geof to put in the loft but have never got any further than that. Even Bryn has been up there and he is 8. What is up there that they are hiding from me? Perhaps the Adam Ant mug and Tupperware lids are up there?

I am sure there are other questions which I haven't included here, leaving the door wide open for a sequel. Do leave comments with your own un-answered mysteries too and perhaps together we can come up with answers to some of life's conundrums.

Unwanted Hair

 As a three year old, Bryn turned to me and asked very seriously, "Mummy, if you could have one wish what would it be?" I was just weighing up in my mind the relative merits of world peace and an end to child poverty when he piped up, "I bet it would be hair-free legs wouldn't it?" At the time I laughed, but if he asked me the same question today then a lack of body hair would feature fairly high on my wish list.
You see, I am rather more hirsute than I feel comfortable with at present, due to not really having had a proper bathroom for 10 days (see post 'The Bathroom' for further details). As a general rule, and to spare the sensitivities of the rest of the population, I tend not to be one for baring too much flesh. It is thanks to the law of sod that the only spell of adulthood where I have not had ready access to soap, water and shaving foam, has coincided with one of the longest spells of warm weather I can remember. A dilemma then. Do I go for comfort and risk tendrils of under-arm fuzz escaping for public viewing and stubbly white legs being on show, or wrap myself in leggings and a long-sleeved top?
Fortunately the bathroom should be finished today. I can get out all my depilatory accoutrement and even if it snows tomorrow I shall be out there in my shorts and vest top.

Fashion

Like it or not, clothes play a huge role in our every day lives, but for some they are obviously much more important than for others. I love clothes and have recently introduced a self imposed ban of a whole year on buying any new items. A bit draconian I know, but I am determined to save some money and make a bit of space in my wardrobe.
My husband, however, has a very different sartorial philosophy and to him clothes are purely functional. He wears them to keep cool/warm, to stay dry and to avoid being arrested, but he takes no pleasure in buying clothes or what he looks like in them.
I have recently had cause to look through photo albums of myself as a child, teenager and young adult. As a child of the 70s I look back and cringe at the flares, long pointed collars and unhealthy obsession with corduroy which dominated that decade. I had a lovely ensemble which managed to combine all of these; some green cord dungarees (worn with a flowery pointy collared blouse) bearing the slogan 'Have a nice day'. Well, I wasn't going to dressed like that was I?
My early teenage years were not kind to me in terms of looks. Big NHS glasses (you had no choice of frames in those days - they were designed with the sole purpose of making you look like you'd just got off the sunshine community coach and run away from your carer) and a series of what could only loosely be described as hair styles. There wasn't a whole lot of style going on, believe me.
The 90s coincided with my 20s and a time to experiment a bit more now that my mother no longer had a say in what I wore, how I had my hair. By the way, my son is only eight and we already seemed to have reached that stage in his life! The late 80s/early 90s was the era of Dallas and Dynasty, power dressing, city shorts and big hair. I thought I looked fab but when I see photos of myself from this time I just look like an extra from Columbo.
I am now 42 and can honestly say that I feel better about myself than I ever have done. I have found a style that I feel comfortable with, a haircut I love (apart from the grey bits) and I have perfected the art of putting on a bit of make-up without looking like the bride of Frankenstein.
So, I wonder what my 50s, 60s and beyond will bring in terms of fashion? All I can say to my nearest and dearest is that if I get a perm, have a blue rinse, start wearing floral skirts, pastels and beige or insist on putting tights on with sandals then please take me to one side and have a word. I will thank you for it and pay you most handsomely in British Home Stores vouchers.